A new start
by KlikStar
Summary: Cloud has finally learnt to move on with his life and is actually happy with it, that is until his nightmares about the man who started it all begin again and perhaps warn of something stiring in the darkness. Set after AC and written as a lead up to DoC


**This is just something that came to mind while waiting around during all of those exam muck up's which I scribbled down and have only recently had time to type up. I'm not really sure if it's any good but as it's a little different to what I normally do, and is set between AC and DoC, I thought it would interesting to post it and see what you all thought.**

**There is of course no way that I own these guys as Square Enix holds that right, but I did have the idea for this story :o)**

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**A new start**

Cloud woke suddenly in the darkened room a soundless scream pouring from his open mouth. His eyes were wide and filled with fear as his body continued to shake violently, the limbs barely holding him in his sitting position as he drew in desperate breaths of air. The sweat which coated his body now ran down over his flushed skin leaving small trails over the toned flesh, the small gathering drops being forced along their way by his frantically beating heart. The blonde placed a hand over his chest as the pounding organ within began to make the ribs feel battered and bruised, the strong muscle only now starting to calm after trying to tear itself free of his body.

Cloud forced himself to relax, drawing on ever small reserve of control he had to steady his breathing and push away the images which had caused this to happen. It was not the first time he had woken in this way, his body trying to escape a nightmare that it could never be free of, and the blonde knew it would not be the last. He now pushed past the pain and terror which still raced through his veins and instead stretched his sense out beyond the walls of his room, listening to the sounds of the world around him. The other occupants within Seventh Heaven continued to sleep, their peaceful slumber undisturbed by Cloud's own distressed waking. Sighing in relief that once again they were to be left unaware of his suffering, the blonde drew himself back to his own body. A quick check showing that his breathing was now under control and while his heart still ached a little it had once more begun to beat a slow steady rhythm in his chest.

Trembling hands were raised to cover a weary looking face and palms brushed roughly over the pale features, as fingers extended to run through sleep tousled hair. Cloud shivered as the tension within him began to fade, the absence of adrenaline in his system now allowing him to feel the cool night air as it started to caress his wet skin.

The blonde groaned softly as his heart began to ache for another reason, as he began to feel the despair of what was happening to him. These dreams, no these nightmares, were not supposed to be doing this. The world had changed since then, he had changed since then. Cloud knew he was no longer the lost and lonely person he had been and that now he had friends, a life, a home dare he say it ... a family. But still the memories of the past haunted him, the experiences of being Hojo's experiment now plaguing his every thought. The blonde pushed himself free of the sweat soaked bed sheets and walked over to the small dresser in the room, his trembling hands fishing out a spare pair of night shorts before heading to the on-suite bathroom. Thankful for the privacy Cloud quickly stripped and climbed into the shower, allowing a spray of very hot water to play over his body before adjusting it. He needed to feel warmth right now, needed to feel something that was hot enough to thaw the chill in his bones.

After a minute the heat got through to his core and the blonde winced as he quickly moved to add more cold water, his skin now bright red and half cooked by the intense temperature. A few seconds later and the tenderness was gone, the mako in his system dealing with the problem quickly as always. Cloud sighed heavily as he both thanked and cursed the poison running through his system. The blonde knew that without it he would have died many times, that the world would have ended at Sephiroth's hands, and that the people he now cared about would have been destroyed. But sometimes it was hard to see that when he considered what he had also lost because of it.

Cloud felt the tears stinging at the corners of his eyes and quickly rubbed them away as he began the task of washing the cold sweat from his body. He wanted to deny that at times he still felt lost and alone, that the world was a cold and empty place without the right person to share it with. But the blonde knew the truth, understood why he now found it so hard to be truly happy. He had been in love with the greatest person this world had to offer, with a raven haired soldier who was closer to being a god than a mortal man. He had also cared greatly for a silver haired general, a warrior who had once been closer to a loving mortal man than the god he tried to become. Cloud felt the tears escape and run down his face, the small drops betraying him and showing his pain to the world. He wiped them away in a rush of anger and turned the water off, throwing himself from the small cubicle and grabbing the towel hanging nearby.

A few minutes later and he was dry, redressed and sitting back on his bed. The sheets pooled around his lap as he sat cross legged on the soft mattress. The tears had long since gone now, as had the sleep he desperately needed, instead replaced with hundreds of thoughts which scurried through his troubled mind. A dull ache began to form in his skull and the blonde raised his finger tips to massage the temples, sighing as the pain subsided a little. There was just too much to consider when it came to these nightmares, just too much to deal with that he really didn't want to face. Cloud knew what the dreams were about, could remember each and every one of them as if he had just lived it. Perhaps that was because in a way he had, that the dreams were really memories from a past that he wanted to forget but could never really let go of.

Cloud looked towards the closed bedroom door and shut his eyes, focusing his hearing to go beyond his room once more. He listened first to the children's room, smiling softly as he heard their gentle breaths and youthful hearts beating calmly. Their innocence was sometimes the only thing that kept him sane, their hopeful view of the world giving him a reason to keep going. Reluctantly he drew away from them in search of the other resident of the bar, her soft snoring easily leading him to her sleeping form. The blonde's smile grew a little as he thought of the brunet fighter tucked up in her bed, the deadly warrior who was like a mother to the children and a sister to him. Cloud let out a slow breath as he remembered the time when he first referred to her as a sister, how Tifa's reaction to the word had startled him.

He had always known that she felt differently about their relationship, but he had never had the courage to tell her in case she hated him. Then when he had become sick there had seemed no reason to explain why he held back from the affection she silently asked for. But with the Geostigma gone and the world starting to heal he had known that he couldn't avoid it any longer, that in this time of new beginnings he didn't want to live a lie anymore. Not long after the healing rain he had sat her down one night while the children slept and explained everything, his hands shaking as he confessed to seeing her as family but not in the way she wanted. He didn't tell her everything about his past as a cadet, knowing she wouldn't understand the parts involving Sephiroth, but he did tell her about Zack and all the things he had started to remember. He explained that Zack was more than just a hero for saving his life and that he hadn't become the raven haired soldier just because of honour, but through an unknown connection of love. His unknown need to keep Zack in his heart forever indirectly turning him into the 1st class soldier, his own life becoming that of his lovers so that they would never be separated.

He had struggled to explain that part to her, his words faltering endlessly as he tried to describe something which he was still only just coming to terms with himself. He had always known the raven haired soldier meant more to him than just a friend, but it wasn't until he saw that smiling face waving goodbye to him that he had truly understood. The vision of strong features on a handsome smiling face and glowing violet eyes full of love, allowing his mind to connect with his heart and reveal the truth about their past. Cloud could still remember the small smile which had played across his lips as the memories came rushing back, the soldier's last gift to him before he walked away.

To her credit Tifa had sat in silence for a long time, listening as he opened up about his past and not interrupting when his words hesitated or stopped altogether. Cloud knew it was because this was what she had asked for, understood that she was controlling herself until he was finished. It had taken him a few hours to give her what she had spent so long waiting for, to explain parts of his life that he had kept hidden, to try and excuse his need to keep things from her while also apologising for doing it. To his amazement she had not been as surprised as he thought she would be, in fact she had been less shocked by the revelations than he had been. They had spent a few more hours talking about their past together and going over all the things which had happened, the questions and answers passing between them with a growing ease now that they were being honest with each other. The blonde knew he had never spoken so much in his life, the freedom he now felt at being able to really start over helping to give him confidence. The night had soon given way to morning and together they watched the sun rising on a new day, knowing it was also the start of a new life for them both.

That had been 11 months ago, nearly a year having passed them by as they moved on and tried to build new lives for themselves. They still lived together in Seventh Heaven, the small dysfunctional family that they were, but now Tifa was dating a nice guy who owned a shop down the street. The rest of their group had been surprised at first, and even the kids had been disappointed, all silently hoping that the blonde and brunet would end up together. But Cloud was happy that Tifa was now focusing on her life and not always watching over his, the blonde simply happy to see his 'sister' was finally enjoying the chance of a life she had fought so hard to protect. Marlene and Denzel soon came to realise that this was what their adoptive parents wanted and after some initial problems had eventually welcomed the new man into their lives. The various members of the group had taken it in turns to watch over Cloud as the relationship began, obviously waiting for him to crack. But as the days became weeks and the weeks had become months, without the blonde having a mental breakdown, even they began to realise that things were ok. Except now things weren't ok.

Cloud had always had nightmares about the past, his horrific experiences always there just below the surface to catch him out. The problem was the dreams were different now, the images and sensations much stronger than before. The blonde knew that these dreams were a result of his past with Hojo, that the repressed experiences had somehow found a way to the surface. But Cloud didn't know what had happened to trigger them now, couldn't find a significant act that had started to make him remember things which he would happily forget. There had been no emotional battles within the group and both Tifa and the children were safe and happy, but still something pricked at the blonde's senses. His instincts warning him that something was coming, like the tension in the air before of an approaching storm. Cloud knew that something was stirring in the darkness, something which was connected to him through the mad scientist, and knew whatever it was there would be trouble. Sighing heavily Cloud settled himself on the bed and closed his eyes, knowing there was really only one person who would understand how he felt.

He would try calling Vincent again in the morning. Perhaps the stoic man would actually answer his phone this time.

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**Note: For anyone who is reading this for a second time, no you are not going crazy and yes the last line has changed :o)**

**Big thank you to Creative Spark for suggesting something which rounded the last sentence off just that little bit better.**


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